west Texas

21 August, 2014

I'm officially a west Texan. I think I could write an entire book on the disasters that have taken place since I moved here, but I don't want to be a negative Nancy, so I'll share with you a few of the funnier ones, because laughing is good, n'est-ce pas?

- I went to the grocery store and I asked a worker, in the bakery department, where the pita bread was, and this mother fucker shrugged at me. I'm like "You don't know? You work here, yes?" to which he reposefully replied "Yep." right before smiling and walking off.

- The cable guy came to install my cable/internet, and he asked me to help him. I'm laughing out loud while typing this, because it was a lot more insane than it actually sounds. Like he literally needed help. "Here hold this. Push this button when I say so." And I had to pay for $100 for the installation. That I had to help with.

- I've made a friend here. She's 65, and she uses words like 'kinfolk' and 'yonder,' and we share a liking for unsweet tea. I just love her.

- I get ogled often, because there are a lot of men here who act like dogs. My favorite instance so far happened in line at a convenience store, when a guy started singing to me.

- I wanted to order a pizza the other day, but couldn't because the place I was going to order from closes at 9:40pm. WTF? Random.

And because blog posts without pictures are no fun, here's a photo of Midland, from space that Alexander Gerst posted on twitter the other day. The squares are oil/gas drill pads.

And for more fun, here's a google map of where I'm at. I feel like crying every time I look at it. I'm in the middle of nowhere!


Inge said...

Am I crazy or is there a place called Hollie in the right upper corner there? Because then I'm confused about where you are ;)
Good to hear there's funny stuff and human interaction!

yours truly, melissa said...

Um the grocery store worker...??? How annoying!!!!! Ugh. Sorry things have been a bit of a bummer, hope they start to look up soon...!

MeghanTopjian said...

I would have seriously lost my shit on the grocery store worker (but not really… because I am all talk). The lady sounds lovely… I imagine her to have an awesome name, like Betsie, Ruth, or Alice.

Joe is in San Antonio right now and all I've heard about is how hot it is…

Matthew Pike said...

there isn't many roads around your way then! no wonder you're taking to Twitter more often.

Doesn't even though where the pittas are, oh come on! So yeah, I've heard of cable guys asking for help before. my mate had to go get screws, help crush a pipe and even changed him separately to use his onw screws!

Buckets & Spades

A Crimson Kiss said...


Stephanie said...

Oh my word. I just...come visit me. Bring Emma. We'll have a party with unsweetened tea and pita bread. And alcohol.

Tiffany Kadani said...

9:40? Those freaks.